Do you ever want something so badly, and you work so hard to get, but exactly the opposite happens instead? That’s because you were the anti-manifestor. By trying to control what happened you steered yourself off course. So how do you fix that?
Are you pushing away what you so badly want?
Do you find that what you want just seems out of reach all the time?
You could be an “anti-manifestor.”
We all l want the best results in every situation. You try to control the outcomes by thinking of every possible thing that can go wrong and prepare for it. That’s exhausting.
It creates a lot of stress and anxiety even though that’s what we wish would go away.
We actually screw things up by trying to control it all, we can’t stand uncertainty.
This is what Brené Brown says in her book, The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You're Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are
“In my research, I found that what silences our intuitive voice is our need for certainty. Most of us are not very good at not knowing. We like sure things and guarantees so much that we don’t pay attention to the outcomes of our brain’s matching process. For example, rather than respecting a strong internal instinct, we become fearful and look for assurances from others. “What do you think?” “Should I do it?” “Do you think it’s a good idea, or do you think I’ll regret it?” “What would you do?” Sometimes our intuition or our gut tells us what we need to know; other times it actually steers us toward fact-finding and reasoning.”
Intuition guides us to better for us, but we don’t know what it is. That’s how the miracles can happen. We have to allow them to happen, rather than twisting and turning away from them by insisting that we know better. We don’t, but that’s the beauty of it all, because it then becomes a great exciting journey where the best is before us if we just have faith that we’ll be guided there.
I struggle with this too. It is a quiet balance of thinking and intuition together. Reasoning and planning but then letting go and letting God. The trick is to let go and let God all along the way and remind yourself to do it. You may go a bit overboard and be over controlling, but I suspect that if you have the intention to remind yourself to let go, then your intuitive nudge will come in and say, time to take a breather and let go.
But you have to set that intention.
We work with both thinking and merge using it with our intuition.
Then we set out on the journey towards what we want. That’s a choice, what you want, your goal. Then you have to take an action step.
When I was looking for the best school for my son, I thought I knew the best one. We tried so hard to get him into that school and then after 2 years of trying, I threw up my hands and gave up. Well, I gave it up to the Universe and God because it wasn’t working.
Then my intuition told me to call a friend who worked in one of the schools I rejected.
That was the next step.
That step then may give us more information and clues as to where to go next.
That phone call to my friend gave me a number of someone in admissions who ended up sending us into a series of interviews at the school even though it was the end of the admissions season for that year.
That next step as we walk is where we need to be on the lookout for synchronicities that give us sign posts on which way to go.
That nice lady in admissions who got us into the last-minute interviews was only employed there for two weeks!
That school ended up being the best thing that ever happened to my son. He was admitted to that school and it changed his life.
You can mess this all up by over thinking and stressing out over trying to know each and every outcome before there is one so you can control it. That’s being the anti-manifestor. I was doing that too, but then I let go, and things changed.
One thing you have to remember is we don’t know what the best outcome is. In fact, our little brains don’t have the divine knowing unless we tap into that source through our intuition. Our little brain of logic and figuring it out is very limited.
But if you allow yourself to just take a step at a time, and have faith that your next best step will be given to you when you are ready, great things can happen.
Brené Brown says, “I’ve come to realize that faith and reason are not natural enemies. It’s our human need for certainty and our need to “be right” that have pitted faith and reason against each other in an almost reckless way. We force ourselves to choose and defend one way of knowing the world at the expense of the other.”
Being in the flow is actually a good thing – sometimes where we think we should go is not the best, and our intuition does know, but it feels uncertain to us.
Have faith you’ll get there. That’s the first step to manifesting what we want.
